Having come out to my parents was not easy, it was was of the hardest things I have aver done so far. I knew I had to do it in order to move forward with my life, be honest with myself and live an honest life. Even though some people say once you come out of the closet you feel this weight off your shoulders and you’re supposed to feel so much better, this did not happen to me.
I thought once I came out, I would instantly be fine and happy and OUT but it wasn’t quite like that. Although my family took it the best way possible, I still felt some kind of emptiness. Perhaps because I was going through a transition [transition & changes], where I had recently graduated, most of my friends had left the city and honestly I was kind of bored of the city. My mother’s constant calls did not help either, she was worried about my well-being and wanted me to be home closer to everyone else in the family. I knew I wanted a change in my life, I was definitely bored of San Francisco and wondered how life would be somewhere else. I knew I wanted to do more before settling in somewhere.
One day talking to my mother on the phone, I told her I would move back home to be closer to them but really, I was planning on going back to school and I was thinking of the possibility of going to Spain. She agreed to it and once she said that I immediately started looking for schools in Barcelona to do a Masters. I was looking for a change, a new experience, a new place. I wanted to expand my horizons by leaning about other cultures, countries and a new continent. I was hesitant about moving back home because I knew I would have a hard time adjusting back to living under my parents roof and getting used to the city. I was really hoping that my plans of moving to Spain would work.
Luckily, things worked out the way I wanted them to work out. I got accepted to the school I applied in Spain, this meant I would be in Miami for four months before leaving for Spain. This would give me enough time to talk to my parents about my sexuality and hopefully move forward on understanding and accepting the fact that I was gay. I think they thought this was just a phase and eventually I would change my mind, for this reason I think it was important to spend time together to talk things out.